The holidays bring the gift of time together—but they can also open your eyes to changes you didn't expect. As you gather with family this season, you might notice that Mom repeats herself more often, Dad's home feels less organized than usual, or your loved one seems a little more isolated than before. These small shifts can feel worrying, especially when you're not sure what they mean or how to respond.
In this Senior Living Live webinar, we welcome Jasilika Davidson of Assisted Living Locators of Central Ohio to talk about something many families quietly worry about this time of year:
How do you know when an older loved one needs more support—without stripping away their independence or dignity?
Jasilika opened with a simple but powerful idea: the holidays create a rare window where families can pause. When you’re back in a parent’s home—walking the same hallway, opening the fridge, sharing conversation—you’re seeing their daily reality in a way you might not over the phone or during a quick visit.
And she encouraged viewers to start with observation, not confrontation.
The “mental notes” that matter
Rather than calling things out in the moment (“You just asked me that!”), Jasilika recommends quietly taking inventory—especially if multiple siblings or relatives are involved and everyone sees a slightly different version of mom or dad.
Some of the first signs she described are cognitive shifts that can feel small at first: repeated questions, losing the thread of a conversation, or seeming “out of step” in a way that’s easy to dismiss as normal aging. But when patterns repeat—especially across multiple visits—it’s worth paying attention.
She also pointed to practical clues that show up in the environment. For example:
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Medication: Are pill bottles full when they shouldn’t be? Is anything organized?
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Mail and bills: Are stacks piling up or payments behind?
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Food and nutrition: Is the refrigerator unusually empty? Is there noticeable weight loss?
Then there’s physical safety. Jasilika described hazards families often overlook—like cluttered walkways, rugs that shift, and even subtle signs of mobility decline. She used a memorable term for what some older adults do to steady themselves: “surfing”—moving from furniture to furniture for balance.
The driving conversation nobody wants to have
One of the most striking moments came when Jasilika shared her own experience with her mother, who had been diagnosed with Alzheimer’s and was still driving—until repeated incidents made it clear something wasn’t right. Her story wasn’t shared to scare viewers, but to underline an important truth:
Sometimes the most loving thing you can do is notice what’s happening before it becomes a crisis.
What about the “hidden” signs?
Melissa asked a question many caregivers relate to: what about the signs you don’t notice right away—like depression, withdrawal, or isolation?
Jasilika explained that when a once-social person suddenly stops attending church, visiting friends, or engaging in routines, it can be a quiet signal that something deeper is going on. Sometimes, she said, the senior may even sense something is changing but can’t articulate it—making support and careful observation even more important.
From concern to a plan (without family drama)
Once you notice red flags, what next?
Jasilika’s answer: build a “dream team.” If there are siblings, divide responsibilities (appointments, legal/POA questions, financial planning, researching options). If you’re an only child, she encouraged involving trusted extended family or professionals—because carrying everything alone is exhausting.
She also addressed common misconceptions around cost and coverage, and why families often feel blindsided when they realize what Medicare does—and doesn’t—cover. (There’s more nuance here than most people expect, and the webinar digs into it in a really practical way.)
The part that stayed with us most
As the webinar wrapped, Jasilika shared something that moved the conversation beyond checklists and logistics: presence. Not just physical presence, but emotional presence—making time for photos, stories, cooking together, and learning family history while you still can.
Because yes—planning matters. But so do the memories.
If you’re heading into the holidays with even a small sense that “something feels different,” this episode offers a thoughtful framework for what to look for, how to talk about it, and how to take the next step with respect and love.
Want the full list of signs, plus the “what to do next” game plan and resource guidance?
Fill out the form to watch the complete webinar replay—there are several practical examples and deeper details we didn’t cover here that can make a real difference for families navigating this season.
